Creating a lasting relationship is not a task that can be completed overnight. When you find a person you want to walk life’s journey alongside, it can make you feel overcome with positive emotions. In fact, plenty of people capitalize upon this rush and make decisions that others might view as hasty. The decision to get engaged too soon, for example, is a mistake that many make. Though some people may know early on whether they want to marry a significant other, there are topics to discuss before getting engaged.
While plenty of topics are bound to come up over the course of your premarital relationship, you may have to push a few points of conversation before you pop the question. These areas should be explored in order to build a bond that can stand the tests of time.
Family
Whether or not you want children is one of the more important topics to discuss before getting engaged. This is a conversation that should happen naturally, but there are people who are either indirect with their responses or assume the other person may change his or her mind when a response is given. However, statistics have shown that a majority of people who express an interest or disinterest in having kids down the line do not change their perspectives. This means if your partner wants kids and you don’t, the relationship is in jeopardy.
While parting with someone you love over something like future family options may seem painful, it will save you a lot of heartache in the long run. When you really want to raise little ones and are denied the opportunity by someone else, or vice versa, resentment and bitterness will set in before long.
Career
Nowadays, people are more focused on their careers than ever before. With the business world operating nonstop on an international stage, there are those out there who eat, breathe, and sleep their lines of work. Obviously, this has an impact on personal relationships and the ability to spend time with a partner. Marrying someone who is on a career trajectory that will take them around the world means that you will have to deal with the repercussions. Whether this means living abroad for long stretches or being apart from your spouse during business trips, sacrifices will need to occur.
If you have big dreams of your own that conflict with your partner’s goals, then this may cause rifts in your relationship. Again, it saves a lot of trouble to break ties before marriage than it does to wait until after you’re legally bound to one another.
Location
Where you want to live in the future is another point that should be brought up, though it may not be as vital to your relationship as family and career. Some people have wanted to live in certain locations their whole lives. Whether you envisioned yourself in an apartment in Manhattan or a cabin in the Rockies, finding your way to the place that your soul yearns for can be a motivating factor to your existence. Should a partner not have any interest in following the same path, it could be a big problem that causes friction.
If love was enough to make a relationship work, the world would not be filled with as many broken hearts. Still, there are plenty of ways to make a deep connection last the slings and arrows that time has in store. A few conversations about what matters in the future is all it takes to know whether the person you’re with is the person you should be with.